My Cuba trip ...

10/1/98
Popper


After a night in Miami, I find myself flying the unreasonable route of Miami, Jamaica, Havana. I arrive with little fanfare, half wondering what the hell I'm doing in Cuba and the other half jumping for joy that all the months of planning have paid off. I've got my cash (plenty of 5's & 1's), a bag full of T-shirts, soap, perfumes, cheap walkmans etc. While standing in line a group of about 10 men are escorted out of the customs queue. A Jamaican gentleman in front of me says that they are a group of Cubans being deported back into Cuba from Jamaica. The sidearms at the soldiers' sides that take them away are a cruel awakening. For us Cuba is a pussy feast, for Cubans, a stark reality.

I get through, get a taxi to the Havana Libre hotel, forget to ask how much and get charged $20, when I probably could have had it for $10. Welcome to Cuba. On the drive in I realize I'm not in Kansas (although I've never been to Kansas so how would I know) But this place is bustling, people everywhere, packed into cattle car buses, riding their entire families on old bikes, 1954 Chevys jostling with Mercedes on the streets. I get out at the Havana Libre, and Chicas are everywhere. I park myself, forgetting when I was supposed to meet Bulldog and Petey, so I order a Pizza (this place is even open 24 hrs), as I'm sitting there, about 10 Chicas try to catch my eye. I'm still a little freaked so I avoid their Hypnotic glare.

Also, about a dozen old/Fat/Ugly men are in there feeding the hottest bunch of honeys you've ever seen. They will tell them they love them, make them feel young again, tell them about their sick mother/toothache/child, and if something better (richer) comes along then they are out of there, even if they promised them Heaven in bed for the money up front. Lo and behold, Petey and Bulldog arrive right on time. In tow, two gorgeous Chicas. Bulldog with Roxanna and Petey with Ody, both featured on their reports. It's going to be one hell of a trip.

Afterwards we go to the casa, I unpack and they go for an afternoon session. Petey gets sidetracked by her telling him she's a virgin (in Cuba?). Then we get rid of them, cruise for hours, head to Los Marinos (the barge) for dinner. The bar is just jam packed full of lovelies and the restaurant is empty. While eating the boys strike up a conversation with a average looking girl who doesn't under what they are talking about. so she brings back her friend to translate. Enter the woman who would change my life. She's about 5'3", striking blond and dressed in red. The boys joke with her and she says hasn't had any in 3 weeks. Must be a record for Havana. We finish dinner, go for another pass in the bar, where I quite successfully (still a surprise for me) get this blondes number and say I'll call. I would have married her on the spot if the boys didn't say there is better to come. So we are off to the Ipanema disco.

Tonight this place is about as close as you can get to a free market brothel as possible. Beautiful to ugly everywhere the eyes can see. The boys are teaching me how not to get tied to one yet. So I play around, flirt, grab, buy drinks, stare, dance (I loved this place) and end up taking Melia home. Why? I have no idea. Remember I've never been with even a US prostitute, and this is my first TSM trip. She is bigger, fatter (not by US standards but she suffers by comparison) and first asks me for $80.

I should have dropped and ran. But I talk her down to $50 and she pushes the right buttons. We get back to the room, she is totally disinterested and detached. She farts around and finally gets down to it. Screws like an American teenager who is worried her dad is about to come home (note: I remember this from High School, I haven't screwed a teenager since I was a teenager). Then afterwards I'm glad she wants to leave, but then she says she's getting Petey's girl because they said they would go home together. Petey pisses her off and then she says I have to drive her home. So I call a taxi, then she protests saying I have to take her. I tell her that I'll drive her walk her to the gate and shut it behind her. She gives me a stare and walks off. Hell, she has her months wages in hand and I called a legit taxi. I think it's over.

Find out next day she ended up waiting for Bulldog and then scamming him into a ride. She doesn't know where she lives and Bulldog almost smashes up the car and himself at 5:30 am. Petey and Bulldog take me under their wing with nothing more than a few e-mails and I almost get one killed. Great way for me to start a friendship, huh?

Next day we all go to Havana Vieja for breakfast. This is where Petey and Bulldog shine. Everywhere we turn there are girls coming up to us. If you stare into space for too long, she will move herself into your line of sight, as if you were looking at her, and your done for. So we get some $.35 baked goods and coffee, and enjoy the show. At one point we sit down at a small cafe, and on the other side of the wall no less that 7 chicas appear all staring us down. Unfortunately they were all ugly, but Petey had no qualms in letting them know.

After Habana Vieja we basically cruise the Malecon and Rampa all day. These guys love there rental car, and see the whole thing as a sport. More bravado than I can muster up so I'm content with sitting in the back seat and laughing. Later in the afternoon I phone Yasmine. We arrange to meet at Los Marinos. She shows up and we have a great conversation, she tells me she has a 2 yr old and the father fucked off to the US soon after she was born. She can talk about sex unlike anyone I've ever met, no inhibitions at all, like were talking about sports. She's a student and from Santi Spiritus. Got a taxi back to the Casa and had a great session.

Yasmine

I know, fat and ugly, well that's Cuba

Afterwards we were talking about that night, my first instinct was to plead with her to remain with me for the rest of the trip. But Bulldog and Petey's warnings got me out of it. I felt guilty telling her I wanted to drop her off before the boys and I cruised, she saw this and said "You can do whatever you want. If it were up to me I would spend the whole week with you, but I can't tell you what to do". ÖHave you ever heard that from an American woman? I don't think so. I take her with us to the Doctor CafÈ and then we drop her off. She asks for nothing but I give her $40. YahooÖBoys night out.

We go to some disco in the middle of Havana, mostly a local place. Not much happening and we end up at Jonnies disco. Dead at first, but picks up nicely. Bulldog finds a girl who is flashing a pen laser around. She gets a laugh when I stick my tongue out and she shines it down my throat. Big mistake, 2-3 more times she does it and nearly blinds me with that damn thing. Petey and me don't find anything, we drop off Bulldog with his and cruise back to the first disco where I think I screwed up a thing for Petey by not checking out her friends. Petey said she was gorgeous, but I glazed over them, just to much for a newbie. Then we go back to Jonnies, place is wild. Chicas dancing with Latino flare everywhere. I cruise around, can't get the combination of straight deal/Pretty girl. After a few hours my ears are killing me (sign of old age). I say one more bar lap and if I don't find anything, I'm out of there. Well there she is. Julieta, 21, petite, tight and wearing an outfit so sexy I almost don't want to take it off, Almost that is.


She says up front $40 for all night. I make it clear that's OK but no more for taxis, sick mom etc. She agrees and were off. Petey dosen't find anything he likes so he drops us off and goes out cruising solo. Julieta is wonderful. Uninhibited, affectionate and even abides by my no smoking (cigarettes that is) in the room. By the time we are finished and drift in and out of sleep it's about 5:30. I tell her if she wants to go no problem, she takes me up, we call a taxi, she dozes off in my arms on the porch swing while we wait for the taxi. It comes and I'm back for a few hours decent sleep.

In the US I would have paid $80 in expenses (dinner ect.) waited 2 weeks and had to deal with all this woman's problems before she would have gave me some loving. Julieta kisses me goodbye and will never bother me again.

3rd day I do a fast cruise with Bulldog and Petey, then decide I want to walk around awhile. Havana is a great city for walking. You get to see the people on there porches, kids running around and you can talk to real people, who really want to talk with you if you give them money or not.

Even if you are in Cuba to whore monger, don't be afraid of the men. Let them know you're not parting with any of your money and they will either bugger off or talk just for the curiosity. The whole time there I don't remember seeing any tourists having a casual conversation with a Cuban man, when alone I would talk with them constantly. And the only thing I ever gave up was a baseball hat to the guy who sold me a $4 bottle of rum (later to be discovered it was fake).

That night we pick up the 2 chicas Petey and Bulldog had made plans with, I grab Yasmine again and we eat, then 1830 disco. As Petey said this place was boring. Lousy show and they kept a poor monkey in a cage near the disco. A caged monkey in Cuba, what could be worse?

I take Yasmine home and it's a night I'll never forget. Next day Petey leaves us, Cuba isn't the same without him.

I want to chill by a pool, so my beauty and I try the Melha Cohiba Hotel, no luck, no Cubans allowed. So we sneak into the National Hotel and chill for 2-3 hours by the deserted pool. Nobody around to hassle us, we sit on a porch swing and my sweetie gets me off under a towel. YESÖÖ She didn't even have a problem when I dropped her home so Bulldog and I had the night free.

We start out at the Havana Libre disco. Two ladies meet us in the lobby, and invite themselves to come with us. Mines name was Yaneli, from some other province, cute and great body but shy.

Me and Yaneli

Bulldog can't get a straight deal out of his, so he pisses her off. I ask how much from Yaneli and she is hesitant. Then apologizes, tells me she hates doing this kind of work, wishes she didn't have to and thanks me for everything up to that point. I immediately feel sorry for her, plus I can't stop thinking about Yasmine (you can take the boy out of AmericaÖ.) . I tell her she can come back with me, give me a massage and some Spanish lessons and I'll give her $20. She agrees, and back at the Casa she tells me her troubles, and if she was telling the truth, Cuban women have plenty. Cuban men can hawk cigars and rum, but the women are the ones who can earn the serious money. And if there husband isn't there pimp, there father or brother (or mother) probably is. If this wasn't true the women would be living the high life while the men squandered.

We have a great talk, and I'm fading out so I ask for the massage. She gives a mediocre massage while I stroke her legs. Afterwards she is sitting up caressing me she gives me a look like, "oh what the hell" and proceeds to give me a great hand job with tongue flicking. About 2 hours after we arrive she leaves, I give her $35 and agree to meet her the next day so she can give me a letter to a friend in the US.

(Note that while she was leaving, Bulldog was just coming in with his at about 4am (where he got his energy I just don't know).

O hour later I can't sleep, my dick is hard again and I come to the realization that there is no reason to have a hard on alone in Havana. After a 5 minute walk I find a great 18yo mulatta, her name escapes me. She was another dream. Best BBBJ I've ever gotten, loved doing me as much as I loved doing her. And with no complications, she's out the door.

If you see this one and remember her name, let me know!

Next day (Wed) we meet a chica of Bulldogs, who brings a friend, and tell them we're going to the beach. The friend was gorgeous, but I told Yasmine I'd take her with us, so Bulldog was stuck with 2, only in Cuba are you lucky enough to have these problems. Beach was a hedonist's dream. Walk onto it and you are offered chairs, drinks, food and if we were unaccompanied I'm sure chicas, there were literally thousands of them there. Bulldog's chica tries to talk me into buying her some weed, it's tempting but in hindsight I didn't need to risk jail. Although I'm sure for a Joint they would let a tourist alone. Yasmine later tells me that the girl asked her if I would be into getting some Cocaine as well. Not surprisingly she ends up pulling a scam on Bulldog (not before he has a threesome with them).

We met up with the first 2 chicas that Petey and Bulldog met me with. So Bulldog has no problem for a date that night. We take the ladies to the Marina Hemmingway disco. Great show and the dancing afterwards was about as hot as you could get. The chica Bulldog was with couldn't make up her mind if she was dancing or fucking. And Bulldog smiled appropriately.

Roxanna, to bad you can't see the nipple action happening in the shirt!

Yet another unforgetable night with Yasmine for me.

The next day is what I think of as my last day. I give Yasmine money (total of $80 for the 3 days she spent with me) and just about a duffel bag full of stuff, some I intended to give away, other stuff I just felt she needed and I could buy more. I get to the airport, can't figure out where my check in gate is, ask information, and guess what, hurricane George is coming fast, all flights cancelled. As I go into the Air Jamaica office, for some reason I'm the only one smiling. I meet a Jamaican lawyer who lives in Boston and missed his plane on Monday, now the Thurs. plane is cancelled, all would be lost for him but he can somehow get a cash advance at the airport bank with his Chase Manhattan Visa card. I try it with mine and the bitch pulls out a pair of scissors and cuts up my card!!! Shit!! Luckily I have others, but my Spanish sucks and she didn't speak English so we go at it for 10 mins. Turns out it was my fault. Lost the card, got another one, found the old one and mixed them up before I left. Stupid me.

So anyway back to the Casa, tell Bulldog how terrible I feel that I can't be back in the states now and I need a Chica to calm my nerves. We head to that disco that Petey talked about, the one were we can't remember where it is (and won't for we need some secretes). See great show by a local band. Old Van Morrison dude leading a great Latino band. Rocks the house, of which I didn't notice more than 2 other foreigners. I meet Lioys, from Holguin, looks like a Latin version of the Chick from FAME (Irene Cara?) Never discuss money, take her home and man o man are the Cuban women great. I've never been to Asia but plan to go, as soon as Cuba falls into the Sea. End of debate for me!!

Next day hurricane hit hard. I stupidly loose my rain jacket so I hold up in the Casa for most of the day. Feeling sick and being stuck in a natural disaster in Cuba doesn't give me much to celebrate. About 6 pm the waves are breaking over the Malecon, and the lights go out. I'm the Boy Scout type, always prepared. I brought a flashlight and even some candles, but shit, I gave them all to Yasmine when I thought I was leaving. So the owner of the Casa gives me a candle and drinks some rum with me, this is where they let me know my $4 bottle of rum is a fake. He gives me some of the real thing, and he ain't kidding. I would have never known.

About 2 hours later the lights actually come back on. I would have thought that they would be out for days, but no, just down the street there is a utility truck patching things up. Hurricane let up that night, went with Bulldog, Roxanna and the now famous Ody, remember the Virgin from Petey's report, to the Las Vegas disco in old Havana. Lousy show, had a good contortionist if your into that kind of thing. Danced with Ody. And don't worry Petey, I let her go at the door. Went home, then I went and cruised the Melia Cohiba and Libre/Rampa area but nothing struck my fancy. My only night in Havanna alone, if the hurricane hadn't cleared out the streets, probably would've found something to inspire me.

Next day went to the Havana Libre, met up with Garfield the Jamaican Lawyer and an American with his new bride. They are on their honeymoon in Jamaica and decide to be adventurous and go to Cuba, then the airline looses their luggage, cancels their flight and they run out of cash. I can't imagine coming to Cuba with a new Bride. I'd probably run home to divorce court. We all shared a cab back to the airport, which was a zoo. I reluctantly left Cuba, crying all the way. 1 night in Jamaica and then a long ass 2 connection day home.

Wow I want to go back. It's all I think of now. Will I ever be satisfied if I'm not in Cuba. I'll know after a few more trips.

If you read this far maybe you are interested in my final thoughts on the trip. After hanging with Bulldog and Petey I sort of decided I'm not the type of guy who thinks that playing with the girls is the whole game. Instead of cruising every day, I'd rather find one, and take her with me in the things I'd like to do, like swim, explore, fucking like there is no tomorrow. Although with Bulldog and Petey it was so much fun, I don't know what I would have done without them. I look forward to meeting up with them again..

I also felt deeply sorry for the girls that I saw who obviously got no enjoyment out of doing what they were doing. More girls than I expected seemed to like the lifestyle they were leading, if it was an act then they were great actors. But imagine living in a society where your own daughter/sister/wife was humping any fat sweaty guy with a big enough wallet. I also didn't feel a real need to pursue "the life" as much as I did before I left, it was fun to try, but I have too much empathy for the girls.

Getting close to Yasmine was also a very eye opening experience. She let me know how the girls really felt, what they really said (let's just say that more than one had something to say about us that they didn't think would be repeated). And I felt totally secure with her. At one point we were getting gas and I stepped out of the car. She leaned over, pulled me back, and pushed my wallet which was sticking out deep into my pocket. She later lectured me on keeping my stuff safe when I have a girl in the room. Can you believe it? I've called her several times, I am sending her a care package and have written a letter. I hold no fantasies that she will wait for me, could have been married, or didn't really like me at all but did it just for the money., But please, on your TSM Honor, if you see this one, tell her that her American boyfriend with the 2 English mates has a big place for her in his heart. And for me, leave her alone (don't worry she has plenty of friends hanging around that I wanted to bang).

Hope you enjoyed the report and thanks for reading. I hope it was time well spent. Forgive my mistakes, take it for what you will. Feel free to flame me, you are entitled to your opinion and I'm entitled not to care about it.

Popper.